Yes, yes! I have been SUPER lazy, to the point that the last time I put 'pen to paper' was exactly a week ago so the day count is roughly around 19-20. Funnily enough, I've had this tab open for the last 3 days racking my mind to come up with something witty or something exciting to write about when in all honesty, I couldn't think of anything.

The last week+ has been awesome. Jacs and Mikey have been in town and we hit the ground running when they got here - shopping, eating, touristy shit etc. Then hanging out with my new friends Raz and Jas (ha! that rhymes) (ha! I obviously need a life) They are just 2 of the most wonderful people I know! They are a true testament to how great love is and are the epitome of 'humility'. Also an old friend Nic and her boyfie Mitch were also in town so was glad to catch up with her also. Love that we all got to hang out as new friends at a gay strip club. Funnily enough, it was so awful we all left.

Yeah, I've eaten a shit load in the last week - whatever. I've also run my ass off, sweating between Williamsburg and Brooklyn bridge. I've had a bit of action since the last time I was here. Turns out he's a dick but I can't deny that it was fun. I also did a few shoots in that time. By the looks of it, a routine has definitely been in play.

I've been here now for just over 2 months. With self discovery always on my mind, I wonder if I have learnt anything in that time? I wonder if I'm closer to figuring out who I am? Do I have new desires, hopes and dreams? Yeah, kinda. 

Not that I owe anyone an explanation but I've decided that I am going on a little holiday from this thing I call 'FASHUN' I know what I want but I still second guess it because for the last 2 years, all I've known it FASHUN! So for now, I'm putting it to the side because really, I just want to take this experience in. I know there are thousands of people out there that would kill to come to New York every year, or even holiday every year. I'm 22 and I've been to some of the most beautiful places in the world. Not many people can say that and for the first time ever, I want to sit back and appreciate my accomplishments to this date. It's not to say I'm giving up and stopping here. I just need to have a Kit Kat moment. 

I've got my plan now. I'll keep you informed.
EATS: Beer, an assortment of BBQ, cocktails, beer, frozen yoghurt from 16 Handles, beer, a selection of salads and hot food from Wholefoods, crackers and hommus, cocktails, burger, fries and banana split sundae from Sugar Factory, beer, Ruben sandwich and pickles from Katz's Deli. (FYI, that's 3 days worth of food - I'm not that massive)
SHOPS: Top from Uniqlo.
MOOD: Giddy.

So it's been like 3 days since I last blogged BUT I swear I have a great excuse; JACS IS HERE!

Most people don't know who Jacs is but to me, Jacs is that person you tell everything to. The person you know will somehow understand you even when they can't relate. She is a shoulder to cry on and more importantly the person you can piss yourselves with. Essentially, she is my 'Grace'. And so fitting to call her that when we are both in New York at the same time!

So fashion week came to an end.. FINALLY! And to kick off the time off, Jacs and beautiful Mikey arrived. It's so good to have them here - I miss the talks of bowel movements and odd period pains. Of course, on their first day, I take them shopping and big American BBQ - standard. The last few days have basically been the same, just swap BBQ with burger every now and then. They have also been fuelled by alcohol and more alcohol, so much so that I am writing this blog while being extremely hung over.

We celebrated Jacs' birthday last night by heading to The Back Room - an old speakeasy from the prohibition days. It was a whole lot of Melbourne in a corner with my old friends Jacs and Mikey meeting my new friends Jas and Tim. Two words on The Back Room: STRONG GROG! And the rest is history. Afterwards, we hit up Katz's Deli for a late night binge and boy was that a brilliant idea. Meat on top of meat, with melted cheese and in-between bread.. #revelation

Of course, I wake up with a rocking headache this morning but do the right thing and go for a run along Hudson river. Of course, by the time I had run from my apartment to the Hudson (approx. 5 min walk-2 min run) I felt so ill that I vommed right into the Hudson. I persevered and was able to sweat out a decent amount of alcohol and deep fried goodness. I still feel like shit though.

My food in take since the kids arriving has sky-rocketed so today I'm taking a break.. until dinner. I'm thinking a beer and some good old festival food down at Mulberry St.

I would have written more but I'm still dying right now so I'll save my energy for another day!
EATS: WARNING: THE LAST 2 DAYS I HAVE BEEN SO BAD. Special K and 1 piece of vegemite toast, 2 sliders and a handful of fries and onion strings, Chobani yoghurt, a market vegetable platter, oat cookies and home made San Choy Bao.
SHOPS: None.
MOOD: Giddy.

Despite having started this trip on the wrong foot and being VERY discouraged by the negativity of certain individuals I've met during my time in NY, today I came to the conclusion that amongst all the big names, in the big lights, with big attitudes and bullshit, there is an elite group of people who in fact are.. NORMAL!

I got to spend a great deal of time with a small package of fabulousness I like to call my 'Friend in Fashion'. Now she owns her own business, is a successful blogger, is a very worldly person and is super beautiful. Now some people would automatically assume that people like that would be what the industry like to call 'a bitch' BUT in fact she is quite the opposite; SURPRISE! It bothers me a little that people make the assumption that if you are in a higher position then they are, that you are automatically an enemy, a threat or even worse, a bitch! What happened to appreciating individuality? Since when did success become a down fall? Did people's pride grow so much over the years that we could no longer look up to those who were doing better then ourselves and instead decided to make them the competition?

The last two days haven't been so hectic, thank God! A show here and there and some more quality time with Jessie. I was introduced to a cool Italian label called Hache. It was the best styling I had seen all week! On point with trend, colours and textures. I also had the chance to see Sass & Bide today. Another standard Sass collection. In other words, if you were to buy a piece from the collection, you would know it was Sass - not that there is anything wrong with that.

As you can see from above, I ate a fair bit of shit the last 2 days BUT I also went for a few decent runs as well. #comeatmesamplesizebody #itwillneverhappen #whatever

In short, nothing maj happened and a nice treat from the hectic days before. Oh, and I met Heidi Klum today and she liked my clutch and my hat and thought I looked funky.

Every night, I would spend 20 minutes going through images on-line; art photography, fashion editorials, historic images and so on. I would do this to stimulate the right side of my brain and to be inspired. My process is: Google>Search>Right-click>Save. I haven't done this in over a month.

Just a few minutes ago, I did it. It felt weird but I did it and strangely deep down, I kind of had a moment. I'm not quite sure what that moment was but it felt different. I still have no idea the direction I am supposed to go in life. I've been reading about omens the last few days. For those who don't know what an omen is, it is a prophetic sign. For those who don't know what a prophetic sign, Google it. Now, I'm not one for spirits or guardian angels BUT I do believe in karma, that we feed of the vibes of others whether it is good or bad and I also believe in omens. 

So my question is this: How many omens does it take to confirm that what you are doing is right or wrong for you?
EATS: Special K, cocktails, beer, Manly burger, sweet potato fries, onion rings and an ice cream sandwich from Umami burger.
SHOPS: None.
MOOD: Blah.

I feel blah but seeing as I made a vow to write something every day, I'm determined to follow through because about 50% of my life, I have never followed through. (I totally tried to make that dirty just then and it most likely worked you sicko)

Sunday was perfect minus the popped blister on my right foot but Sunday is always the perfect day of a rooftop party at the Empire Hotel with my babe Jessie.

Caught up with some old friends and made lots of new friends, including the beautiful Jasmin from Friend in Fashion and her lovely husband Tim. being amongst a thousand wankers, it was so refreshing to sit down and have a chat with modern normalcy. I must admit, meeting Jasmin and her husband was a little bit intimidating - you have a girl and a guy, both highly successful, she has a blog that generates 100s and 1000s of followers and both shit hot, you'd be crazy not to be intimidated. HOWEVER, they are without a doubt the most genuine, down to earth people who in the space of a few hours, became the friends you feel you've had your whole life. Chatting to them all afternoon was like having a glass of sangria on a warm night - refreshing and delicious! And did I mention how shit hot they are? #notfair

Spending hours surrounded by hot people requires a burger break - standard. As part of my 'Best burger in NY' list, we hit up Umami Burger in Greenwich. Not much can be said about Umami except for #epic. Without a doubt the best burger I've had to date. Service was perfect and the burger basically gave me eyes as soon as it hit the table. I ordered 'The Manly' burger - a combination of beer cheddar cheese, smoked-salt onion strings, bacon and of course a perfectly cooked 16oz patty. That's all I'll say and that you must go eat there! And as a little quick 'unofficial' birthday celebration, I decided to stick a candle in the ice cream sandwich to wish my beautiful friend a happy birthday!

Regardless of how you feel, where you are or the struggle you may or may not be facing, there is always time for a burger.

'When I'm eating, that's all I think about. When I'm marching, I just concentrate on marching... Because I don't live in either my past or my future. I'm interested only in the present. If you concentrate always on the present, you'll be a happy man... Life will be a party for you, a grand festival, because life is the moment we're living right now.' - Camel driver, The Alchemist.
EATS: Burger and fries, roast chicken and vegies, chicken curry from my local asian place, a blondie from babycakes and lots of beer and water.
SHOPS: Black blazer from Helmut Lang.
MOOD: Relaxed.

Okay, so I've been a little busy the last 2 days and wasn't able to write anything on here - NYFW knows hectic.

So finally with some down time, I've picked up all my dirty laundry off the floor, popped on my gym gear and come down to the laundromat to do some laundry and empty my thoughts over a book and beer.
The last 2 days have been full of running around the west side, from Lincoln Centre through to Chelsea and back with my partner in crime Jessie. 

I've loved it so far - getting up and personal with the industries finest, seeing the up and coming trends for next year. This is what I love, I love fashion week. I love the pace and being constantly on a mission. It's definitely soothing to the mind and helping with the exercise too.

I'm finally starting to feel myself again. But I still wonder, what is out there for me? I spend my whole day in fashion mode and come home to watch the cooking channel. Who am I?

New York has been so good for me. Not only have a lost myself in this city but I've also learned that in the heart of this concrete jungle, I know I will be able to find myself again. 

'Everything on earth is being continuously transformed because the earth is alive ... it has a soul. We are part of that soul so we rarely recognise that it is working for us' - The Alchemist.

That struck a chord with me. After having lost myself countless times over my teenage life and early adulthood, I've realised that it will constantly happen until the day comes, when I have accomplished every dream that I've ever had and experienced everything it is I want to experience. Which in reality will never happen because life can't go on if you're not constantly dreaming of something better... or can it?
EATS: Champagne, Burger, fries and ice-cream from Shake Shack, more champagne, canapes and more champagne.
SHOPS: None.
MOOD: Chilled

Just to clarify for those people asking, YES, I have been here for more than 5 days.. it's technically been over a month since I left Australia. #yikes

Anyway, here's an unexpected quote *insert sarcasm here*
"Every year the women of New York leave the past behind and look forward to the future... this is known as Fashion Week."

And with that, begins the short rants on New York Fashion Week. A week where hundreds attend, yet all you see on street style posts are of the minor elite who have thousands if not millions to spend on clothing while the rest of us plebs try and make do. Some not even bothering. YES! I'm talking about you, the lady who attended the show this morning wearing a denim skirt, t-shirt tucked in and.. BALLET FLATS?! #wtf

That said, let me make this very clear: style is not about the labels you wear, but what you do with the clothing you have. HOWEVER, if you are going to attend one of the most prestigious events of the year and only have ballet flats to wear, I would say you need Jesus.

All my rants aside, today was fabulous! Not only did I get to roam the streets in my quadrupole denim outfit and be photographed by some 'freaks on the street', I also got to meet some lovely people, talented designers, chill with some sexy boys and hang out with my new 'sister from another mister' Jessie! I'm so grateful to her because having her around is like having a piece of home with me everywhere..

So much so that for the first time in a long time, over a burger in Madison Square Park, I opened up about my walls that keep me guarded. Moments after I had finished my story, it made me realise that I am normal and the moments of heartache and moments being down are completely fine having allowed a fool into my life. Funny that - you get fucked over, you become a stronger person, but down the track, you'll never forget how you got fucked over and you're still fucked. Meh, too much fashion to talk about how fucked I am.

Now, what to wear tomorrow? #firstworldproblems
EATS: Chicken sandwich with fries, frozen margaritas, chicken, biscuit and mac'n'cheese, kale, mushroom, orange and tofu salad, countless beer.
SHOPS: Kate Spade clutch
MOOD: Giddly.

For the first time, in a long time, I felt like me. I came alive.

For a short while, my cares were thrown away with the arrival of a new/old friend. I say 'new/old' because we had never formally met before but for the last few months and known of each other and had known that we would both be in NY at the same time. We did drinks, we ate fried chicken and we had a good laugh. I also got to have a good bitch about my hates of the city. Don't get me wrong, I love this city but seeing as I have been feeling very misguided and lost the past 2 weeks, something obviously went down. 

John Casablacas sadly passed away today; in short, he is responsible for the careers of legends like Gisele Bundchen and Naomi Campbell. In his final interview, a particular line really struck accord with me.

"I endeavored to live a life that reminded everyone that, even when you run your business professionally, fashion should be about fun, superficiality and sensuality, and not to be taken as seriously as some tend to do.” 

Yeah it's about fashion but swap the word 'fashion' with 'life' and these are definitely words to live by, period.

Even though I know I'm going to miss out on a shitload of episodes of Unique Eats and Donut Wars, I'm making a vow to stop feeling sorry for myself, leave the apartment and make a big bang in the city! I still have no idea where I want to go in life and in my career BUT I know that New York is way too much of an epic city to stay indoors.

As the fabulous and legendary Cher sings: 
'Torn up, busted, taken apart
I've been broken down
Left with a broken heart
But I'm stronger
Strong enough to rise above'

Well speaking of Cher, here is my new lip-sync to her new fabulous song, Woman's World.
#carriewannabe #carriebecomescherforonenightonly
EATS: Toast, Hill's country chicken, fruit salad, grilled chicken and kale salad.
SHOPS: Polaroid camera and phone credit
MOOD: Determined.

So it turns out, I'm more scattered than a middle-aged lady about to hit menopause.

I made the trek to West 34 and 9th to visit the renowned B&H Photography store. I walked in with a plan to buy an old film camera to take experimental photos on. Two seconds after walking in, I'm presented with every flashy camera under the sun. Three seconds later, I change my mind about the camera. Of course under unnecessary pressure from no one, I panic. 

I was then taken out on a second date to lunch. It was perfect - fried chicken and a biscuit. We left the restaurant, started walking until I had realised we had walked 20 blocks and coincidently ended right outside their apartment. Being the lovely person that they are, I was invited up. Three seconds after walking in, we were playing tongue wars. Two seconds after they took their top came off, I looked at perfection and then I changed my mind, made a lame excuse and ran; I panicked.

This got me thinking, everyone has some sort of plan or idea as to how things should be. However, when presented with a wider and better selection at the last second, is it normal to panic over the possible change? I guess to avoid panic,  it's important to 'roll with the punches'. Mind you, if I eat any more fried chicken, I will literally be swallowing peoples punches in my rolls.

Now that I've made my decision to 'find myself', I must admit, a terrible weight has been lifted off my shoulder BUT I still end today with a little disappointment because I feel like I made no major changes. I guess this is another example of 'unnecessary pressure from no one'. A friend sent me a beautiful quote today saying: 'Don't forget to fall in love with yourself first'. I guess I just need to learn to open my little Asian eyes to the reality of life and the possibilities of change. Afterall, that's what I want, right?

Needless to say, I left today with a rad Polaroid camera and a third date.
EATS: Cheerios, Caesar salad, chicken and kale salad and vegetable chips.
SHOPS: None.
MOOD: Irritated; only from the heat.
Today I strolled through Central Park, had a little picnic under the sun, then walked to Barneys, bought myself a beautiful Balmain coat. Then got picked up by my driver who drove me over to Butter for dinner and drinks..
What a crock of shit!!
I did nothing today. I stayed home like a good boy and rested up after my dramatic turn of events yesterday. Turns out, passing out of 5th Avenue isn't the new black. Instead, I flicked through a mild selection of trash tv, cooking shows and the occasional movie.In between all of today's activities, I made an epic Caesar salad for lunch and a chicken and kale salad for dinner. 

Tomorrow is a new day.

'Don’t worry about being worried. You’re heading out on an adventure and you can always change your mind along the way and try something else.'